Dragon Week / What's New Would You Survive A Dragon Attack? July 29, 2022July 21, 2022A Cat3 Comments How many times has this happened to you: It’s a normal day, and then—WHAM, dragons attack? Hey, don’t worry. Happens to us all. That’s why we developed this quiz to assess your chances of survival in the face of aggro’d dragons. Good luck! Would You Survive a Dragon Attack? I don’t know what you’ve done to rouse the ire of a dragon, but the peril of your situation is undeniable. Is your life salvageable? Might you survive the beat of dread wings and toothiest bite? Take this quiz to find out! You Are A Machine Of Dragon Destruction Heed close my words, for I do not pronounce this lightly: I am awed and humbled to stand in the presence of so great a dragonslaying champion. Hear me? I’m flabbergasted to the floor. Dragons are rare creatures and you are the root of their scarcity. By the cold steel you carry in both spine and sheath, you personally confine our mythical creatures to their stories and legend. We live, work, love, and thrive beneath the comfort of your sentinel shadow, safe in the crook of your strength as you stand against the big shapes that move around us in the sky. The world is a big place, but not bigger than you, brave dragonslayer. We thank you. We love you. Idk, Maybe You’ll Survive. Flip a Coin It is our nature as mortals to beautify our memory and experience with luster, greatness, and meaning. Our lives are brief, and everything we see is not everything we know, so there is temptation to correct the stories we tell. Elevate the stakes and nobility of combat and erase the exhaustion and hurt. The truth is that often the present is more chaotic than we will ever admit, or even properly understand in retrospect. Will you triumph over the dragon that salivates over your downfall? Who can say. The reality will probably be messy and bathed in adrenaline. If you survive, we will tell stories of your noble victory, and if you fall? Your tragic sacrifice. In the moment that will decide your future, the only two that will exist will be your dragon, and you. Survive or die? Either outcome seems likely. You Are Super Mega Dead Dragon’s have wings, wicked talons, sharp teeth, strong scaly limbs, and wildfire in their lungs. You have…. A snowball’s chance in hell. A snowball’s chance at the nuclear core of a star. A snowball’s chance at the heart of a supervolcano on a planet made up of fire, magma, and pyroclasm. Here’s how your fight against this dragon is going to go: You: “Huzzah! Avast ye dragon! I defy you!” *Dragon swooping through the air with mincing claw and burning breath* You: “No, no—AHHHHH!” *fwshhh—GRAAWWWR—schhhhpleck, and more fire noises* When the flames die, they will leave behind bare dirt, so thoroughly scorched that nothing will grow for years, a charred powder so fine no one will ever know it’s the remains of your disintegrated bones, and your ghost, forever haunting the spot where you fell in combat against a dragon. It wasn’t a fair fight. OwO Dragonic Matrimony?? Your duel against your dragon is a firelit dance of glinting swordsteel and lithe wings. Is this mortal combat, or an elaborate courtship ritual? Parrying sword to scything claw, you catch the wink of a fine reptilian eye. Love conquers all; it’s only fitting you should fall. Doing laundry with a dragon is a uniquely large challenge, but what love isn’t? The barbecues are wonderful. Your dragon lights the grill with an exhaled spark and takes to the skies to hunt while you grill and entertain the guests. When your dragon comes down with wyvern flu, you prepare chicken stew in industrial vats and read aloud fantastical stories about lizardine wizards and the humans they love. Their family is huge—in quantity and size, but everyone stoops to listen when you stretch the chords your throat in practiced draconic (you’re getting better everyday). You and your dragon are in love every day. Looks like you will survive your dragon attack : ) Think very carefully. I’ve prepared a list of potential allies. You may select one to aid you. If your dragonfight were made into a movie, what song would play whilst you epicly clash? Okay. Confession time. Is your dragon like mad mad, or just annoyed? What did you do to get yourself in this situation? Which famous dragon weakness are you planning to exploit to ensure your victory? Choose your armaments. What relevant dragonfighting experience are you bringing to the table, here? Spill your resume. What special dragon power (every dragon has at least one) does your dragon have?